Keep Your Hands to Yourself...

Gentlemen, when it comes to women, please keep your hands to yourself!  It's never worth the mental, physical, and emotional energy you expell during the process and the stigma from it can follow you for your entire life.  It's also just wrong to do.  If you're ever in a position where you feel like you need to hit a woman, then it's a safe bet that you don't need to be with her or around her anyway.  

This past year there has seen an explosion in the awareness of domestic violence and violence amongst men and women.  It's as if society thinks that this is some new phenomenon.  But this is nothing new at all, it's been going on for centuries and that's not surprising when you take in the fact that we live in a male dominated, patriarchal society.

 But there is a duality to this issue as there is with all things in life and that's what in intend to address right now.  In particular I'm speaking about the issue involving now former Florida State freshman quarterback De'Andre Johnson who was at first suspended while under investigation by State Attorney Willie Meggs for his involvment in an altercation with a 21 year old women in a bar.  After video footage of the incident surfaced this week of Johnson punching the women in the face, Florida State decided to terminate Johnson's scholarship and kick him off the team.  

Now, I'll be the first to say, that I think the University did the right thing.  As a student athlete he knows and understands that he is held to a higher standard than the typical student, and what he did was an assault and it's wrong.  He should have know better than to put himself in a situation that could jeapardize his status as an athlete.  However, from a legal, moral, and common sense standpoint, I want to also address what else the footage showed.

 Everyone seems to want to point out this young man's transgression and throw him under the bus and as a result no one is recognizing or atleast admitting to the fact that the video also shows the young lady being the aggressor, and throwing several punches first before actually connecting once as De'Andre Johnson was trying to restrain her before throwing a punch of his own and connecting.  Why is it okay for a woman to hit a man or challenge a man physically and we allow it, but we come down harshly on a man for retaliating?  Although I admit that what Johnson did was wrong, I also recognize that he didn't initiate the fight nor was he the aggressor.

De'Andre Johnson looking to earn his spot on the team in the FSU inter squad scrimmage.

De'Andre Johnson looking to earn his spot on the team in the FSU inter squad scrimmage.

 Nevermind the fact that his attorney says that the young woman used racial remarks toward Mr. Johnson, that can't be corraborated from the film.  But what can be corroborated is that she started the physical activity and he finished it.  So before everyone, including Attorney Meggs tries to ruin this young man's life, who is going to hold this young lady accountable for her actions as well, which legally counts as an assault.  

I've heard on plenty of occasions of women attacking men and no one thinks a thing about it.  In most cases people either laugh it off or chalk it up to a tough woman.  But when it's the other way around, the narrative is much different.  Men are villafied, and critisized and people are quick to run to the woman's defense.

 I remember when the whole issue with Ray Rice went down between he and his wife and there was psychiatrist on CNN talking about domestic violence statistics.  I wish I could remember his name to use for a reference point but alas it escapes me.  One of the statistics he brought up was that, despite common belief, many times women were the aggressors in lots of domestic violence situations, but men were often charged more because the difference in damage caused by the men as compared to the women was much greater which was a result of the size and strength of the man.  

Now I'm not here to justify any form of domestic violence by the hands of men or women, what I do want to shed light on is that violence between men and women is unnecessary in general.  It should also be punished fairly and equally no matter the gender of the offenders in any situation.  And as someone who has heard a woman once say that she has no fear of fighting a man or attacking a man because she knows that more than likely he won't hit her back, I can tell you there are women out there with that same mindset, who take advantage of this very same situation and it's unfair to men as well as women who are actually in abusive relationships and attacked by men with no provocation.

Clip of the young lady striking at Johnson before he threw a punch of his own, a punch that ended his career at Florida State

Clip of the young lady striking at Johnson before he threw a punch of his own, a punch that ended his career at Florida State

 Women who attack or provoke men with violence should be prosecuted just as harshly as their counter parts, and the actions or rather non action of Prosecutor Willie Meggs will do nothing but encourage manipulative women to perpetuate these toxic situations that so often occur, but people are unwilling to recognize or speak upon.  There is one thing that some of these women aren't taking in account, while there are many men like me who see no purpose or point in hitting a woman and would never do so, there are men out there who think completely opposite.  

As I've heard one man say before, "If a woman wants to put herself in a man's place and attack me, then she better be prepared to be hit like a man."  While I don't condone it, it is a reality. And the only way to prevent it or put a stop to it is to punish men and women alike for physical violence upon each other as well as educate both genders about strategies to avoid violence.